Ridgell's Originals

I often get asked how to start conversations with friends about Jesus. There are any number of "conversation prompts" out there. You know, if they say that, then you say this. Then depending on what they say next, you say this or that. You can even find leading questions that will let you use the old "but you said..." approach.

I don't have any of those. I just don't think memorizing scripts is the best way to share Jesus. And Jesus didn't teach his disciples a script, so...

But here are some natural ways to be a friend.

Pray lots. Pray for needs they have. But also pray for open hearts and pray for opportunities to say something. Pray for the courage to speak.

Invite. Children's programs are a great attraction. Holiday invites (Christmas and Easter) are good. Special programs (caring for aging parents, parenting, marriage seminars, financial issues) are really effective.

Talk about Jesus. Give God glory for healing, finances, crisis solutions, etc. Always. I usually follow this up with some kind of invite to talk more. My conversion, what Jesus means, what God has done, etc.

Ask about their Jesus journey. Just things like I would ask about anything. If I am talking about baseball, I ask did you ever play? What position? Why'd you stop? With Jesus, I might ask if they ever went to church, or what they think about Jesus.

Don't be afraid to apologize. Sometimes it is personal if you have not always lived up to your faith. Sometimes it is an apology for what they perceive the church or some Christian did. If I don't know the situation I do generic apologies. I don't know what happened, but if you were hurt I am sorry. I hope they did not mean to but we are not perfect. Forgiven.

Have your neighbors over for meals. Get to know them. And let them know you.

Finally, a word about the cost. I am often told by Christians that they are afraid they will lose friendships if they talk about Jesus. If your Jesus talk costs a friendship it wasn't going to be much of a friendship. I mean, Jesus is the most important thing to you. How can you be friends with someone that will not even acknowledge what is most important to you.

But you don't have to be pushy, arrogant, a religious bully, or display a spiritual superiority complex.

But you also don't have to try and convince them you are just alike. Jesus does make a difference. We may all be sinners but we Christians are forgiven. We may all have issues, but ours get fixed by God.

These may, or may not, work for you. But I think they are helpful.

God bless you as you share His Son in your friend/co-worker/teammate/classmate, neighbor sphere of influence.

 I don't do a lot of living tributes, mostly I write tributes for those who have gone on to heaven.  But every once in a while, I get the urge (or the Spirit influences me) to write a tribute to the living.

We recently went to Sug's 90th birthday party.  For a long time, we went to the same congregation.  I was one of her elders.  Saw her often.  Talked to her often.  As did my wife, Marsha.  Recently, we each moved to different congregations and didn't see each other as often.

But here is why it made my happy to celebrate Sug.

She really is one of those people that has one foot in heaven.  Her body is strong, but she is 90.  Her mind is getting a little fuzzy but she still has that same bright smile.  And she still knows us.  She has already lost a husband and a daughter.  So I wonder if she has her eyes on something way better than this life.

She has served countless people.  Literally.  I cannot fathom the number of meals she has not just provided, but served.  For years I didn't think I could do a funeral without Sug being part of the funeral meal.  She was still going and helping and organizing up till just a few years ago.

She was a great encourager.  Heard me preach hundreds of times, mostly to college students.  She always had a hug, a compliment, or a encouraging word.  Always.

Sug has prayed thousands of prayers for people.  For peole to become a follower of Jesus.  Lots for Christians who were struggling.  

She has been an influence and role model for dozens and dozens of younger women.  I saw Kim and Cindy serving at the party.  Traci and Trina.  My wife.  I could just keep on.  

And here is one of the best things I can say about Sug.  If you ever wondered if you were loved, all you had to do was find Sug.  And you knew.  She loved you and so did God.

I may be saying all this at her funeral some day.  But if not, seeing her just reminded me to love a little more, serve a little more, pray a little more.

Thanks Sug.  

I love you.

 John Willis went to Jesus a few days ago.  I was long thru with school when he came to teach at ACU.  I never even remember sitting in a Bible class under John at a church or even a Lectureship.  We were not really frineds but I knew him.  And he knew me.  Saw him occasionally at Cracker Barrel.  As did everyone else in Abilene.  I did read some of his material, especially in the Old Testament.

And here are three things I learned from John Willis.

Write for real people who are trying to learn.  I always got the point he was making, even if I didn't agree with it.  I appreciated that.  He was way smarter than me and knows more Old Testament than I ever will.  But I never got the sense that he thought he was smarter than me or anyone else.  He just shared his insights in a clear way.  Never belligerant, arrogant, or condescending.  That is rare.

People matter.  Really smart theologian and people lover is a rare combonation.  But that was John Willis.  Always knew your name.  Always asked how you were doing.  Always made you thing you matter to him.  And here is the thing... you did.  Really.  That is why all the wait staff at Cracker Barrel loved him so much.

Be a good husband.  I watched him with Evelyn.  They were a great team.  He really loved her.  They did great ministry together.  Hospitable.  Caring.  Willing to give advice.  You just wanted to have a better marriage when you were around them.

Well done Dr. Willis.  Well done.

 I met John when he started worshipping at Hillcrest.  He had been invited by one of his good friends living in the same Half-way house.

Joseph was baptized right before he was incarcerated.  But he stayed faithful thru his entire prison stay.  Gary was a Christian that knew Joseph when he was converted.  Stayed in touch while Joseph was in prison.  When Joseph got out, it was Gary he turned to for help.  And Gary and his wife Sarah did help.  

That is how Joseph showed up at Hillcrest.  He wanted to go to church with Gary.  And since he and John were good friends, he wanted John to come with him.  He did.  And John started going to the Bible study Gary does at the Half-way house.  He went to our preacher's seeker class.  Came to the Jesus Journey class most Wednesdays.

Joseph kept talking about Jesus and John decided he wanted to be born again.  Gary spent several sessions talking to John out of the Scriptures about what it meant to follow Jesus.  

He wanted to be baptized at church so last Sunday between worship and class we baptized John into Christ.

But it was a major effort.

John is physically handicapped and it is hard to walk and navigate stairs.  And our baptistry stairs are narrow and steep.  Gary guided his feet and Joseph and I helped John down into the baptistry.

We announced that there was going to be a baptism if anyone wanted to stay.  Probably only about 98% did.  They get what matters.

I introduced John to his new family.  Asked what he believed about Jesus.  John firmly stated his conviction that Jesus was God's son and that he had died for his sins.

And all three of us, Joseph, Gary, and I baptized John.  

As we were all in the water right before his baptism, we opened the baptistry doors and found the whole congregation singing the closing song.  The Great I Am.  That is a great song.  Tears were streaming down John's face.  And mine. And Joseph and Gary.  John struggled to life his hand to God during the song.  Joseph reached for his elbow and held their hands up together.  

John later apologized for being so emotional.  I told him he should be emotional because his sins were being washed away forever.  And he said, "But Steve I have so many sins."

Me too John.  We all do.

And that is why Jesus came and died for us.

Welcome to the forever life in the Kingdom of God.

 People are asking what is going on at Hillcrest.  We are baptizing lots of people.  We are reaching the marginalized people in our society.  I think they are looking for a program or technique to use .  The obvious reason is that we do not have a program or any technique we teach.  We do pray.  A lot.  We pray for God to bring us people that are seeking Him.  We pray for courage to speak.  We pray for eyes to see.  And here is the only other suggestion I could give.

Go find you some Vaughns, Stones, Battens, and Varners.  None of these are on staff at Hillcrest.  They are just couples who want people to know Jesus.  One is a reatired couple and he served for years as an elder.  One couple spent some time in fulltime ministry and are now enjoying some of the greatest ministry of their lives.  The other has done ministry and they very much consider themselves ministers even if they are not being paid by the church. Another has overcome some amazing handicaps to spend their time talking to the marginalized about Jesus.  

They are really nothing alike except for their passion to live as disciple makers in their world.  Co-workers, friends, clients, family, neighbors.  People that show up at our building wanting to know more.  People they meet at coffee shops.  Or halfway houses.

They are constantly asking, inviting, studying, witnessing, sharing their testimony.  

All four of these couples (and both spouses) believe they have a mission and a purpose in life.

And I probably ought to include us in this.  I am part-time staff at Hillcrest to talk about Jesus, but Marsha is not.  If you know us, you would correctly assume I do most of the teaching.  But Marsha does most of the inviting, hosting, welcoming.  We both want people to know Jesus.

And there are many more.  I have just been really involved with these couples over the past few months.

Each of these have different ways of sharing their faith.  Some use the old topical studies.  Some teach the great themes of Scripture.  Some do verse by verse studies.  Some share stories.  Some just talk about Jesus in the midst of doing for others.  But all of them teach Jesus.

So if you want to see you church really start growing, pray lots.

Then turn loose your Varners, Stones, Battens, Vaughns, and Ridgells.

God will take care of everything else.

  

 Let me start by saying I am working under the assumption that every church, at least in theory, is built on Jesus.  If not, then you are not even a church.  Not part of the body of Christ.  

But having said that, I think there is one big decision every church has to make.  I think how you decide this issue determines your future, and your usefulness, in the Kingdom.

What are you going to do about the Bible?

I believe that we all read the the Bible the same.  No one really argues much about what the Bible says.  The debate comes over what it means.  

I grew up in the conservative movement called churches of Christ. They were strong on Scripture.  I learned a lot of Bible.  But they did sometimes take it to extremes.  They would study the Bible, make an informed judgement or opinion about something it meant, then give their decision the same weight as definitive statements in Scripture.  

That is a problem.  Claiming the Bible says what it does not say is a dangerous path to take.  You end up with a lot of people leaving your fellowship.  They may not leave Jesus, and they still may value the Bible.  They just do not want to stay in a faith community that gives opinions the same weight as commands. 

I do think churches have to be careful to distinguish between what the Bible actually teaches and what we decide based on that teaching.  Scripture puts a lot of emphasis on our worshipping together.  Not so much on the details of how we worship together.  

But having said all of this, I am more concerned about a different trend I am seeing.

I hear a lot of Chrisitans, and churches, using the Bible as a nice resource and sometimes helpful guide, but not the infallible word of God.

Some parts of the Bible may not be Holy Spirit inspired.  They are just the writer's opinion.  Or, some parts of Scripture were true when they were written, but not true today.  

So every church in every time and in every culture has to continually re-interpret Scripture.  

So what is true in Alaska in 2023 may not be true in Cuba in 2023.  What was true in a certain location fifty years ago may not be true today.

So Scripture is always a moving target.  You can never really count on it to be your rock solid truth to point to Jesus and how to live as a Christian in this world.  

Young people raised with this view of Scripture do not end up changing churches.  Many of them end up leaving Jesus.  No foundation.  No solid truth.  No light for their path in this world.  

A church that constantly interprets Scripture in light of culture will not last. 

I do want to say that I do not believe these churches do not follow Jesus.

I just have never been able to seperate God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, and Scripture.  I don't think they are in conflict.

And it is certainly clear that I believe the Bible is the inerrant word of God.  I know many times in my life it has served to correct me.  Even rebuke me.  And the Bible has showed me a better way to follow Jesus.  It gives me great comfort.  And it makes me really uncomfortable.  But I love the Bible.  I read the Bible.  I teach the Bible.  

The Bible contains the words of life, but the Bible is not life.  Jesus is.  

But God gave us the Scriptures for a reason.  

So if you want to know about the future of your church in say fifty years, take a close listen to what they say about Scriptures.

And if most of the teaching is about why the Bible does not mean what it says, you will face a very uncertain future.

Maybe I am wrong.  But I don't think so.

 

 If you live in or around Abilene, TX you know about Kayla.

She died last week from a stroke suffered a couple of weeks ago.

Now I don't write about everyone that dies in Abilene, and I wasn't even real close to Kayla.  But sometimes I just think there are things I learn from people that I want to remember.  

I was friends with Kayla.  And her husband David.  Always enjoyed seeing them.  Enjoyed their Facebook posts.  So here are a few things about Kayla I appreciated and want to remember.

She loved her community.  She was an Abilene ambassador.  Wanted only the best for our town and worked to make it a better place.  

She loved Rotary.  District governor (I think that is what she was).  I just know she traveled all over representing Rotary and Abilene.

Outstanding professional.  In-Focus, she and David's digital production company, did outstanding work.  They didn't have clients.  They had friends they helped.

Great sense of humor.  I like people that can laugh at themselves.  Kayla could.  And did.  Almost everyone in Abilene remembers her ongoing commentary on her serious fall in a hotel room.  Hysterical.  And made you think about being more careful.

One of our last interactions happened just a couple of weeks before the stroke when she commented on one of my blogs.  It was well thought out and about Jesus.  Just what you would expect.  I always appreciated her taking time to read and watch my stuff.  She was busy.  Made me feel special.  Just like she did the other 100,000 people she connected with.

So thanks Kayla.  Thanks for being who you were.  Thanks for impacting so many people and businesses here in West Texas.  

You made this corner of the world a better place.

 Austin will be 13 tomorrow and here are a few of the reasons I love him and am so proud of him.

He is fun.  You cannot be around Austin without having fun.  Great sense of humor.  Enjoys everything we do.  Laughs.  Gets along with everyone.

He is smart.  He learns things quickly.  Makes really good grades.  

Good athlete.  He doesn't yet have the drive and discipline that his older siblings have, but he has a chance to be a really good athlete.  Football, basketball, and baseball.

Still loves to hang out at the ranch with Pops.  Actually works and helps out. 

Loves Jesus.  And here is the thing I really love about Austin.  He thinks everyone should love Jesus and he tells everybody about Jesus.  He is anxious to share his faith.  And does.

Still talks.  A lot.  But I love that too.

Maybe I love Austin because in a lot of ways, he reminds me of well... me.  At least when I was that age.  

So Austin...

God is going to do great things in your life.  And I am convinced he will use you to do amazing things in the lives of others.

 Wow.  18!!!  Going into her senior year in High School.  Everything is moving fast and it just seems like yesterday that we at the hospital when she was born.  

So as is my custom, here are just a few of the many reasons I love Anna and am so proud of her.

Thanks for the memories.  We have so many great and wonderful memories from our life with Anna.  So many things that make us laugh.  Make us smile.  For us, she was the perfect first grandchild.  

Great athlete.  Plays three sports and excells in all of them.  So fun to watch her. Volleyball, basketball, and softball.  Hadn't played softball since the 4th grade.  Went out to be with friends and just sit on the bench.  Started at third base all year and crushed a homerun to help put her her team into the State semi-finals.

Very good student.  Makes great grades.  Every teacher likes her.  She is disciplined and organized in her studies.  

Still enjoys being with her Mimi and Pops.  Always runs to hug us.  Hangs out with us.  Thoughful.  Even texts us and calls us.

But most of all, I am proud of Anna becuase she is a believer.  Makes time for mission trips and youth activities.  Loves God and Jesus.  

Like all of our grands, Anna is not perfect.  But it is sure hard for us to imagine how she could be any better for us.

Love you Anna and cannot wait to see what God is going to do with you and thru you.

 I wrote this a couple of years ago.  And I have had a few conversations lately with leaders  wrestling with this.  So maybe this is a good reminder for all of us that lead God's people.

When leaders get their feelings hurt.

It does happen.  Elders, preachers, their wives.  Even their kids sometimes.  They get their feelings hurt.  You need thick skin to be a spiritual leader.  It is hard.  Most people never know how many hours you spend trying to help people.  Investing in lives.  Late nights.  Emotional investment.  Tears shed.  And that is just for the real spiritual leaders, not just the "go to meetings" leaders.

You give solid, practical, truthful advice.  And the person you are trying to help gets mad.  Or they leave.  Or they lie about you.  

They get personal.  They bring up your faults.  Or if they know about it, they bring up your past.  It hurts.  Because leaders have feelings too.  

So how do you handle the hurt feelings?

Here are a few suggestions.

They are rebelling against God, not just you.  When you have to confront someone over their life choices, or when they demand acceptance of sin choices, you have to remember it is not personal.   They are refusing to submit to God, not you.  

Stand on Scripture.  All of our leadership advice has to be grounded in Scripture.  So when they yell or get angry, I just point out that we are talking about the Bible.  So be mad at God, not the messenger.  

It is not your job to make everyone happy.  

People sometimes leave no matter what.

Some are going to live the way they want.

Some people do not react well because they are fighting a war within themselves.  Be patient.  Be loving.  Be there.  Sometimes they do in fact surrender to God and repent.

You cannot save everyone.  That is not even your job.

I find it helpful to remember that God -- and sometimes His leaders -- must have been really frustrated with me sometimes.  And I wanted to do better.

This is a hard one, but I have found it true.  When you have seen someone at their worst, when you have waded into the blood, mud, and tears of their life, when you have lived with them thru the worst experience of their life... You are a living rememder of that time.  They love you, they appreciate you, they will always be grateful.  And they will not always want to be reminded by seeing you.

Spiritual leadership is hard.  Abraham, Moses, David, Peter, Paul.  They all get it.  They understood rejection and rebellion.  They got their feelings hurt.  They cried.  And they kept following Jesus.  They kept pointing people to Jesus.  And they never gave up.  

You shouldn't either.

Because sometimes they listen.  They respond.  They repent.  They remain faithful.